Panem Et Circenses

08 Mar

Bread and circuses – this is what everybody wants to see. Everything else can be simply ignored because, you know, life is already complicated enough. If you don’t offer the bread or a good way to make it and your daily life isn’t a never-ending source of hilarious stories that will make even a classic INTJ laugh, nobody cares you exist. So let’s bring forward the circuses.

Let’s face it, if you are bitter and spiteful like me, people tend to forget you exist. Or did I become bitter and spiteful because of this? Nobody knows and nobody cares. I am the invisible girl hidden behind a pile of bright-colored pictures form a magnificent world far, far away. My life is a circus but I am as interesting as a mote on the arena.

I can’t dance and I am not funny. I don’t play parts and I don’t tell tales I can’t feel with my heart. I just look at the world through a lens and give everybody the circuses they so desperately want while trying to figure out what the f*ck is wrong with me.

Why are people like this? Why all they want is the show to go on, regardless of what lies beneath? Once the lights go out, all that’s left is silence.

I keep waiting and waiting for somebody to break the silence but the only broken thing is me when I realize that without the circus I am nothing. A boring gloomy girl who happens to love what nobody in her life cares about.

Congratulations! You somehow got to this part of the post jumping from picture to picture, barely reading any word. The few words you read made you utterly confused and you have absolutely no idea what they have to do with these dancing people. Do you see? All you are here for is the show. You want to know more about the dancers, the costumes, the lights. You don’t give a shit why I live in such a colorful world and still see everything in grey.

Don’t bother to read any further. Enjoy your show. It is called Bon Odori (盆踊り) and you can read everything about it in Wikipedia as I am obviously not going to tell you anything. Why? Because it is something I don’t care about. It is too bright, too colorful and those dancers are way too cheerful for a girl like me who spends all her energy on hating the world that forgot about her existence.

That’s it, the show is over. When the curtain falls, you will remember only the dancers and not a single word from what I’ve written. It’s not important anyway, not more important than living for the circuses. And what will I remember? This:

A friend who asks for neither bread, nor circuses.

I won’t blame you if you want to leave this place immediately and go read some other, more positive blog. I can recommend you Katie whose smile never leaves her face. This girl knows how to make her readers happy and now she is even holding a giveaway you definitely don’t want to miss.

See you again. Or maybe not.


Posted by on 08.03.2012 in Faraway, Photo walks, Reflections


Tags: , , , , , , , ,

6 responses to “Panem Et Circenses

  1. Bridget

    08.03.2012 at 15:45

    If you must know, I was actually skipping over the pictures, quite intent on your words. (Didn’t really think about it until I came to that part in your post). And I would like to hear more about what it is you love … besides Evanescence and cherry blossoms on a sunny day. :)

    • Albizia

      08.03.2012 at 17:02

      So you prove that generalizing everything is a bad habit. Sorry…

      I obviously love taking pictures, even of things I don’t particularly like :D . The list of other things I love is quite long but I think focusing on it more often is not a bad idea at all.

      Happy international women’s day!

      • Bridget

        09.03.2012 at 1:20

        oh, and I forgot to say, great photos, too … now that I’ve actually looked at them. :D

      • Albizia

        09.03.2012 at 11:42

        And we have more rain bringing in the rain boot fashion :) .

        For me taking pictures replaced writing a diary. They keep my memories for days when I need them. I just look at a picture and have everything again. Not only the scenery, but also the feelings, sounds and even smells. It is for this reason that I want to always have a camera with me. The DSLR makes the best pictures but even very old low-quality pictures make me smile when I look at them and remember what a great time I’ve had. You can be both in a moment and record it. Take the camera out, snap the perfect shot and keep enjoying the moment knowing that you can go back to it whenever you want.

      • Bridget

        11.03.2012 at 7:21

        lol, I don’t own a pair of those funky rain boots. Do you? If I did, it would have to be something fun, maybe with little pink frogs, I don’t know.

        Thanks for the tips. I think I’ll try that.

      • Bridget

        09.03.2012 at 1:18

        I didn’t even know there was such a thing as international women’s day. I return the well wishes, along with a general “hope you’re having a great day.” It’s a warm, sunny, you-know-spring-is-coming kind of day here.

        I’m trying to get in the habit of taking more pictures. It just seems like such a chore to stop what I’m doing and take out the camera, like I have to choose between being in the moment or recording the moment. Maybe I’ll have to be more deliberate, like doing a photo shoot called “things I like.” :)


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